Onward

"If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours."

~ Henry David Thoreau

Well, I did “it.” Or at least some part of “it.” My mom and I will travel back to my sister’s home today (which we were planning to do anyway). I’ll stay there Wednesday and then hop a plane to my old stomping grounds (the place I lived before I moved back to my hometown to stay with my mom) on Thursday.

It went from, I need to finally make that call to K.M. to find out what the what is, to, I need to have “this” happen in person. I need to check things out with my eyes.

Actually, fate’s a funny thing. I wasn’t planning at all to fly to my old town. I was planning on going out on the town with a good friend in the big city on Friday night to celebrate my birthday, which is Saturday. Unfortunately, we got our wires crossed and she already had a commitment that night. So, then, I’m thinking how can I have any fun in the suburbs? Suburbs and fun, isn’t that an anomaly when your single, without kids? I mean, don’t I need at least one night out on the town in this month-long trip with my mother, for crying out loud? I thought, yes, I do! Then, from that, I began to think that maybe this would be the perfect time for me to go to my old town. I do have some business that needs taken care of. Yes, I could do it over the phone and internet, but I’d probably get better, faster results if I could be there in person.

And the thing is, before all this came about I did finally make that call to K.M. Whoa, can I just say how strange it was to talk with someone you broke off all communication with seven years ago. Yeah, strange is the right word. I can’t even begin to get into exactly what he said (I promise I will sometime, just not yet!). Suffice it to say, he was thrilled, thrilled, that I was calling him from out of the blue. He said so. He said it made his year, or something like that. But after talking with him I just realized there is no way in hell I can get to where I need to be with "this” decision without seeing and talking with him in person. I gotta find out how whacked out he is!

Truthfully, I can’t really imagine how it could work, but I guess I’m still just trying to follow through on all of my “inklings” (and unfortunately I don’t have nearly enough of them). Like I’ve always said, this is my story, I think I’m somewhere in the middle of it, and K.M. is definitely a part of the journey. I’m going to do as my grandmother often said to do, “Just keep on keep’n on!”

I’ll only be there two nights and I’m definitely not planning on “being” with K.M. See him, talk to him, yes, “be” with him, no. I’ll be trying to see as many friends as I can in the short time I’m there and I’m looking forward to spending my birthday eve with a good girlfriend sipping martinis.

But the fact is: I have an interview with my first potential sperm donor, although he doesn’t know it now, and he may not know it even after I’m done with the interview process! Onward I go...