Anthony J. D'Angelo
Oh, good Lord (my new fav exclamation for all the the things that Life is throwing my way these days)! If only I could spend the 45 minutes getting my makeup and clothes just perfect for the perfect guy all would be right with the world, but as it is, I do it all for... eh, whatev.
Yeah, my kingdom awaits, but not with this date.
I arrived at the semi-classy establishment early enough to get a place far enough at the end of the bar so as not to be the conspicuous - "this-couple-is-obviously-on-a-blind-date" people. I actually saw a guy across the bar from me who I thought could possibly be my date, so I asked the bartender to inquire as to his name. Alas, he was not "the he." I sat and waited.
I thought I should, for etiquette's sake, wait to order my cocktail until the gentleman arrived (although, with my nerves of meeting a total stranger upon me, I definitely wanted to f@ck etiquette and get my damn martini : ).
Finally (ten minutes later) this guy walks in and sits down slightly catty-corner, across the bar from me. I had the feeling it was my date, but I decided I would let him find me, i.e., I was just gonna watch him squirmishly look around. Aw, I put him out of his misery soon enough and gave a wave his way indicating I was most likely the one he was looking for.
He came over, sat down and I ordered my martini, which (I think) led him to order a nice scotch on-the-rocks.
Physically, he wasn't unattractive, he just wasn't really "my attractive." But I was open to him charming and impressing me into some sort of chemistry-of -the-mind that he could parlay into, at the very least, some forceful, future attachment.
It wasn't happening for me. Though he must have felt comfortable enough with our conversation that by the time we finished our first drink he asked if I was ready to order another. And, yes, I was.
We drank our second round discussing his relocation to the city in which we reside. He said he had come back with his finance and bought a home so as to be closer to his mother, who at the time, was battling cancer. His mother overcame her illness, his relationship with his finance did not. After four years being together they parted ways. It had now been two years since the time of their break-up.
I'm a good questioner (and listener). It comes from a genuine place of interest. I truly think I could have probably parlayed it into a good legal career - I'm that inquisitive. Whatever he revealed, I just asked him for further information of interest.
At some point he mentioned that he hated working for someone else and that he wanted to have his own business. I asked him if he had ever read., "The Four Hour Work Week." He hadn't, so I suggested that he might, because it does deal with a lot of the things he talked about business-wise.
He was a good, kind guy, but he needed to find a girl... different from me.
One thing I know for sure, whatever my intellectual capacity is, or isn't, is that I need to be intellectually stimulated. I need someone who challenges my mind; who makes me want to know more about life and my place in it. My blind date wasn't that kind of guy.
I can probably overcome a lack of physical chemistry, but a lack of mental chemistry is a deal-breaker.
Truthfully, the thing I liked most about him is that he told me he sets his thermostat at 68ยบ at night when he sleeps. I do love sleeping feeling like you need a blanket (or guy!) wrapped around you.
In the middle of writing this post I got a text message from an unfamiliar local number that read, "Ms. M. - I want to apologize for boring you with my drunken ramblings. It was great to see you."
I was confused. I was sure I hadn't given my blind date my last name or my phone number. But I thought maybe the girl who set us up had (although I didn't think even she knew my last name).
I texted back, "As popular as I am I'm replying 2 who I think may b my top 3 contenders. So, which 1 r u? ; )"
A text shortly arrives that says, "Makes me feel better that there were three - D.S.
Mystery solved. D.S. was a classmate from my high school reunion, one of the many I hadn't seen, or heard from in thirty years! He actually goes back even further than that, as he came to my Catholic elementary school in 7th grade.
Then he text, "Who were the other ones besides K. (another guy from high school)?
I reply, "Went on blind date 2nite!
He text, "And....?"
I answer, "He asked if Animal Farm had 2 do w/ horses."
He text back, "Did you go on a blind date with P.D.? (P.D. was another guy in our class at the reunion). Sorry, but I had to laugh at the dis. I guess D.S. must not think too much of P.D.
The next thing I know, my cell phone rings. I answer and it was D.S. It was cool because we talked for about forty-five minutes (he was on a business trip, he said he was in NYC, but who knows, he could have been in Cairo, or Moscow; I think he works for the C.I.A.) and got to have a real conversation versus the chit-chat that's about the only kind of talking that can take place at a reunion with people you haven't seen in years.
D.S. is happily married (and I wouldn't be into him in a romantic way even if he wasn't). But he is the kind of guy that's solid and thoughtful, someone who it is definitely nice to be re-connected with. And I hope that our friendship, now re-established, will be something that continues.
After getting off the phone with D.S. and finishing my wine I had to think that the final analysis of my blind date that evening was: NEXT!
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